abracadang:

thirsty ass hoes these days smh

charmancler:

who cares about hashtags when there’s hashbrowns

(Source: charmancler, via fake-mermaid)

towritepoems:

my chemistry teacher calls babies “fresh humans”

(via relahvant)

ribbu:

there’s a special place in hell reserved just for me

it’s called the throne

(via orgasm)

verrlust:

i wonder what it’s like to be so hot that people follow you just because you’re hot

(via crystallized-teardrops)

stability:

its weird how different your life could be if people found you more or less attractive

(Source: stability, via fake-mermaid)

singitforfrankiero:

Everyone has a gay cousin. If you don’t have a gay cousin, then you might be the gay cousin

(via crystallized-teardrops)

snapchatting:

you’re the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen, and no i’m not saying that because we’re right next to McDonald’s and i’m out of money

(via pizza)

tatehorror:

tatehorror:

Today my dad texted my mum (they have been divorced for 12 years) completely out of nowhere and said “hello miss cranky pants”

image

(via crrocs)

devonbanks:

this is still my favorite tweet of all time
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